4 Ways You're Sabotaging Your Love Life
Your love life up until now might have been fun and exciting or maybe it seems like a total waste of time. Dating and getting to know new people should be thrilling and bring you happiness, but if you notice a string of bad relationships, it may not always be “them”, chances are you are also partly to blame.
Dating sabotage affects lots of people and usually in a way they are not even aware of. Life experiences will definitely change the way we see people and the world around us, but it’s important to remember they should not be the reason we miss out on happiness and love.
Not Letting Anyone In
Keeping your guard up to avoid getting hurt is a common form of sabotage that comes from past relationship experiences. The thought is “if I don’t expose myself to pain, I won’t get hurt”, but always distancing yourself from a potential love match will only ruin your chances for a great love life.
You don’t have to put all of your cards on the table from the beginning, there are many things you can keep to yourself until you are ready to share. Learn to open up to new people, so that you can get to know one another and build on what could be a wonderful love life together.
Lack of Communication
Good communication is one of the main foundations of a healthy relationship. Sometimes you may have something on your mind but choose to keep it to yourself until it slowly builds into resentment. Without expressing your thoughts and feelings to your partner, they might not have a clue about what’s bothering you.
Give them a chance to hear your side of a story, whether it’s just being in a bad mood, disagreeing with them on something or when you want something more in the relationship. Don’t assume your partner can read your mind, take a moment to sit down together and build on a relationship of trust and understanding.
Showing Low Self-Esteem
Self-esteem is your overall sense of self-worth and how you feel about yourself. Talking about yourself in a negative way and treating yourself harshly will not only show them the type of treatment you feel you deserve, but also send alarm bells that you may not be the best person for a good stable relationship.
If you have a hard time loving yourself, others will find it hard to as well. Take the time to make yourself a priority and practice self-love before considering jumping into a relationship. You are worth far more than you think.
You Don’t Trust Anyone
When you have experienced people abusing your trust, it can be tough to give others the benefit of the doubt, but it’s important to remember that a new partner has nothing to do with what happened in the past. Immediately distrusting new people in your life is unfair and is guaranteed to cause problems in your relationship.
Vocalising your worry that your partner of cheating on you or badgering them about where they are going, who they are hanging out with, or making wild assumptions will only ever cause tension and ruin your chance to genuinely get to know them in good time.